Lance and Me

29 Jan

images-4I now am experiencing what perhaps drove (pun intended) Lance to use performance enhancing drugs: That urge to feel on top of my game;  That need to feel the wind in my hair, throwing my arms in the air as the roar of my adoring fans envelops me with the sweet caress of awe and adulation. . . . .  . whoops, wrong drug . . .

I’m on steroids. Desperate times create desperate measures.  It’s week 5 of hacking, coughing and choking:  My bronchial tubes are as tight as Lance’s hamstrings; I Gasp for  breath as if I’m on a breakneck climb up a mountain; My rib cage throbs with each explosive exhalation.

I went back to the doctor.  I NEED DRUGS!  GET ME DRUGS!  Desperation creates extreme responses and choices.  I get that Lance.

The part I don’t get is the ruthlessness.

3 Responses to “Lance and Me”

  1. hibernationnow.wordpress.com January 29, 2013 at 10:04 pm #

    As much as I adore you I don’t think I would pee in a cup for you. But I’d do just about anything else to help make u feel better.As for Lance, he is a hero to me ONLY about the work, money and attention he has brought to cancer, I bought one of those yellow bracelets too and I’m not sorry I did. But, he’s not a hero to me and I hope they don’t let him compete again. I agree with your friend, he WAS ruthless and beyond. Anyway, I’m worried about you, not him. Please take it easy, when I was on Prednisone a few years ago I felt so GOOD (like the movie Cocoon) that when it wore off, I wept. Love and hugs to you, Laurie

  2. Lydia H January 29, 2013 at 6:02 am #

    The difference is between health and cheating. Sadly, Lance’s victory over cancer and his return to cycling was a huge accomplishment. Even had he won only one Tour, clean, he was a hero. Even had won none, he was a hero. LiveStrong has touched many lives of patinets with cancer and their families. My brother is a survivor. I understand Lance cheating. It must have been extremely tempting. What I have a harder time with is how he treated others. Yet, in a way, I hope he is allowed to compete in triathalons again- as a clean athlete. We need stories of redemption, too.

  3. itsmeenakshi77 January 29, 2013 at 4:30 am #

    I there with you on the last line. One can understand succumbing to the weakness, but ruthlessness!

    I wish you a speedy recovery, Judith.

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