Pacemaking, The Saga goes on

Here’s a sample of the instructions I got before leaving the hospital!

Pacemaker Precautions
• Avoid being near areas with high voltage, magnetic force fields, or radiation because these can cause pacemaker malfunction. (!!! Whaaaaaa?) These areas may include high tension wires, power plants, large industrial magnets and arc welding machines. (There goes my career) Symptoms of pacemaker malfunction are dizziness, lightheadedness or changes in heart rhythm. (Hey!  this is what I got a pacemaker for!) If symptoms occur, back up 10 feet (I thought I wasn’t allowed to drive?) and check your pulse. (Read:  If you have no pulse you don’t need to backup 10 feet)

• Pacemakers inserted today are not affected by microwave ovens. (Yes!  My cooking appliance of choice) Pacemakers have built-in safety mechanisms protecting them from this electrical interference. (Why don’t they have built-in safety mechanisms protecting me from power plants, large industrial magnets and arc welding machines?)

• When you go to an airport, always carry your pacemaker card with you. Because the pacemaker contains metal, it may trigger an airport metal detector. Explain to the airport attendant (Have YOU ever tried to “explain” to an airport attendant anything?) that you have a pacemaker so that special arrangements (read: strip search) can be made for a security check. The metal detector itself will NOT harm the pacemaker. (Read: But the attendant could . . )

• Do not have an MRI (Magnetic Resonance Imaging) test because it can damage your pacemaker. (From now on all diagnostics will be done through exploratory surgery)

Call your cardiologist if you have:
• severe pain at your pacemaker site  (With Fibromyalgia I always have pain at the pacemaker site- long before I had a pacemaker)

• frequent or constant hiccups (Read:  Lay off the beer & peanuts)

• twitching of your abdominal muscles (No sex?)

• shortness of breath  (Yup, no sex)

• dizziness, light-headedness or blackouts (Positively no sex – oh well, what’s sex without beer & peanuts . . .)

To see the rest of my PaceMaking saga  go to HTTP://   Remember! I’m consolidating my 2 blogs to consolidate my energy. And my energy is REALLY zapped and pain level sky high after this surgery

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