We women could take a lesson from the Butterfly fish. Instead of trying to camouflage our rear ends with baggy shirts and body shapers we need a giant flashing eye on our derriere when we have a “night on the town”.
Here’s the basis of my theory:
Butterfly fish (both male and female) are brightly patterned with distinct coloration. (At last! Equality!) It seems that the designs displayed by the butterfly fish through colors, patterns, and the presence of eyebars and false eyespots may serve many purposes.
The butterfly fish use the false eyespots to produce an impression of a head at the wrong end! (I think that is referred to in human terms as “Your getting ahead of yourself” or “he has his head up his _ _ _.)“Their size is larger than real eyes. Researchers suggest that the eyespots serve to intimidate a predator into perceiving that the fish is larger or a member of a different species and discourage attacks.(Would come in handy with unwanted attention at a singles bar) The eyespot serves to misdirect predator attacks toward less vital body areas,( like our _ _ _! – perhaps NOT a singles bar) resulting in decreased predation rates or severity of injury. In some cases, the predator completely misses the intended butterfly fish by assuming a misguided plan of attack or the eyespots could serve as warning signals to predators that these fish are deep-bodied, spiny, and may not be worth the effort to attack..(Well, maybe a singles bar)
Although usually located on the posterior of the butterfly fish eyespots can appear in other areas of the body .The color characteristics may also serve as communication mechanisms (Two eyes, one on each breast?). The coloration of butterfly fish changes in different social situations and sometimes at night. (After the singles bar closes)
Another communicative role of the eyespots could occur between mates to identify each other. Most butterfly fish, occur in pairs and are thought to be monogamous for up to 10 years. (Beats the national norm of marriages) Because the butterfly fish are often involved in activity near territory borders, the eyespots may serve as important cues to help them rejoin each other after being occasionally separated. (Back to the singles bar theory)