It’s Hard being Human.

I snapped at my husband today.  I felt justified to boot.

Why would a therapist, who KNOWS relationship dynamics, why would a therapist who counsels others on how to conduct themselves to make their life better, why would a therapist respond in such an unhealthy way?

Why would a woman with a husband and friends who love her and dog who gives her licks upon request, why would a woman who believes that we are all connected and God is in all  feel alone?

Hate to admit it, but I keep getting reminded that I’m human.

After the stress, excitement, tension of  being “up & on” all day yesterday I’ve crashed.
My body’s aching, my face, feet, legs and arms are burning, I’m exhausted and yes, I feel alone with it all.
Humbling experience.

Ironically, one of the pictures I talked about yesterday was the collage I did depicting my exhaustion and the part of me who yells to pull myself together, get up and get going, the part of me that just sits, frozen in place, and the exhausted part that just lays there listening.

I also talked about the Buddhist saying –
Pain is inevitable.
Suffering is optional.
Today I told that yelling me to shut up and leave us alone.
I choose suffering.

23 thoughts on “It’s Hard being Human.

  1. IF you feel you need to snap, snap away. BUT, apologize and explain why. My goodness Judith, don’t feel such guilt. You’re human, you’re tired, you are in pain. All you did is snap, probably because you are tired as well. Join us other humans, we all make mistakes. If I wrote a blog post about every time I snapped, I’d have an encyclopedia. Love Laurie F,

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    1. Laurie,
      I actually don’t feel guilt. and I actually SNAPPED – kinda like a crockodile – (I always lay low in the water first, before I snap). Hey I like the idea, how about Wickedpedia?

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  2. I am with you today, sister. Humbled, self-critical, defeated (temporarily).

    My suffering and I wish to wallow today. Tomorrow can be a good day, and I will accept all the good things out there in the universe just waiting to show me how perfect I am, just as I am, with all my flaws, (ahem) quirks.

    Don’t forget to let Max talk to you today. He will remind you that it’s all good. For now, my dogs are sleeping. If I get to the point where I can’t stand myself, I’ll wake them up. They never take it personally.

    Hugs and more hugs. Your are perfect, Judy-Judith!

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        1. Hi Laurie – I guess I don’t mean “perfect” as in there’s nothing to improve upon…it’s more of a belief that each of us is a perfect creation of the divine and each of us is following the path set out for ourselves. Perfectly. Perfectly imperfect.?

          So I think what I’m saying is, is I think you’re right. 🙂

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                1. @Jane you were trying to follow the logic? First mistake, there is never any logic when Judy/Judith and I are concerned. If it made sense it would be too simple. Nobody understands it (don’t let Judith convince you other wise!) Laurie F.

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      1. I am TOTALLY READY for Wickedpedia! I think my behavior in the past couple weeks proves I am up for the challenge.

        I feel so much happier just knowing there are people out there who lose their cool when they don’t feel so great!

        p.s. wickedpedia.com is available out there…I’ll do it if you guys do!

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        1. Jane, Laurie F.,
          You guyz get it going I’ll be a contributor!
          Right now I’ve got a teeeeeeeny tiny toooooo much on my things-not-done-people-depending-on-me-waiting-for-me-to-get-them-done list to spear-head it.
          It certainly could be fun and a HUGE CYBER hit. (kinda like “hit” as in “kill)!

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          1. As enthusiastic I feel about the venture, I’m afraid I’m also way behind on my important-things-I-really-have-to-do list, so I’d be wise to not volunteer to do anything. Better to un-volunteer and look a little flaky than volunteer and end up not doing it and proving my current state of unreliability.

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  3. You are human. You are more than your profession but in your human moment you recognize that and call upon that training. After being up all day I’m surprised you have enough strength to post. Take care my sweet!

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    1. Rose, Therapists aren’t suppose to be human. I read that in chapter 3 and answered it correctly on the licensing exam!
      P.S. Please don’t spread it around that I’m not following the training manual!

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