Frankly Freddie – My Human’s New Career

I don’t want my human to get bored and complacent now that she’s retiring.  She could do half-time shows – she’s too old for full-time shows.  I’m interviewing canines who could train her.

Freddie Parker Westerfield,  Agent to the Stars

Freddie Parker Westerfield, Agent to the Stars
Freddie Parker Westerfield, Agent to the Stars

12 thoughts on “Frankly Freddie – My Human’s New Career

  1. I’m not certain my dogs could teach me to do that, and pretty certain I’d run out of breath and energy long before getting through a similar performance.

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  2. Dear Freddie, Don’t worry so much about your human. She will find her way. It just takes a little time of adjustment. Don’t stress over it yourself. She will be just fine. Don’t worry. Please tell her Lexi does anything….for treats and food as does her human.

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      1. Dear Freddie,

        I have known your Human for a long time, and the only way you are going to get this Human to take directions is to make the frisbee out of chocolate. But then again, I seriously doubt your success with this Human if the goal is to have this Human return the frisbee…

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        1. Dear Jan, human-being,
          It seems you have known my Human for a long time . . . she is a bit unruly when it comes to chocolate . . . I’ve trained her to share almost everything except chocolate and grapes. She makes up lame excuses like they’re not good for me.

          Freddie Parker Westerfield, Trainer Extraordinaire

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          1. Dear Freddie,
            Since you are a dog, it is true that chocolate is not good for you. But even though your Human is not a dog, you need to remind your Human that chocolate is also not good for her!!!
            Jan, a human-being

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              1. Dear Freddie,

                Yes, I am aware that some Humans can be overly opinionated.

                However, don’t give up too quickly. Exercise is an excellent source of serotonin. And when you train your Human to catch the frisbee, she will run, jump and tumble which will instantly increase her serotonin level.

                Of course, your Human will complain frequently, so be sure and reward her progress with lots of chocolate! But only after she has had a sufficient period of physical exercise.

                After all, as the Trainer Extraordinaire, your pride and reputation is at stake in being able to successfully train your Human.

                Jan, Human-being

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                1. Dear Jan, Human-being.
                  You would make an excellent trainer of humans. You should consider a career change.

                  Sincerely, Freddie P.

                  I’d offer you a position on my staff but I’m currently not hiring.

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