Write on – Unfair Treatment

Since I spend a lot of time (off and on) writing this blog and attending a writing critique group I figured it’s time to learn the tools of the trade.  I signed up for a free Emeritus writing class from the local junior college.  (“emeritus” is a sophisticated word for anyone who qualifies for Social Security.) 

The first assignment was to write a two page SHORT story about being unfairly treated or treating someone else unfairly. 

(Names have been omitted to protect my image)

Unfair Treatment – Body, Mind & Me

By Judy Westerfield

     “More! More!” my mind screams at me. Her desire reverberates throughout my body. Once again, I’m caught in the middle ­ between body and mind, between hedonism and health.

     The three of us — body, mind and me — have been together a very long time. Over the years the mind has grown bolder, louder. To keep the peace I usually do what she says, even though it’s often based on want rather than need. Today is no exception.

     For the second time in less than an hour I retrieve the half-gallon carton from the freezer.

     “More! More!” She is unrelenting.

     “Calm down. “I’m scooping as fast as I can.”

      I ladle from the carton to the soup bowl –­ 1/3 less fat, 120 calories, $2.99 on sale ­ — spoonfuls of vanilla, chock full of chocolate chunks and ripples of golden caramel. Hard, too hard. I like it soft, just this side of starting-to-melt. Ten seconds in the microwave will do it. I’ve perfected the timing.

      “More! More!”

      “You will just have to wait 10 seconds.” I can be firm.

        It’s creamy, cold, sweet and glides deliciously from the lips all the way down to the stomach.

     “Ahhhh. Mmmm,” she purrs and declares it to be an invention ranking right up there with the discovery of fire, the wheel and Tampax.

      The bowl is empty. She points out that there’s more in the carton, purposely left out on the counter, which is now just the right soft consistency.

     “120 calories per serving . . . 12 servings per carton . . .1,440 calories,“ she calculates. “We’ll just skip dinner.”

*         *         *

     “Why? Why?” My distended stomach cries out, pushing painfully against the waistband of my pants. Hips expand, thighs grate together, intestines grumble while impolitely relieving themselves of gas as I walk to the trash to throw away the empty carton.

     The body unfairly treated, yet again, by me. And the mind . . . she’s still screaming . . .    

   “More! More!”

Bob Blobfish sez:

Bob Blobfish sez: “. . . I prefer ice cream cones –  they’re easier to hold in the water”

14 comments on “Write on – Unfair Treatment

  1. I like your drive. You set up a nice blog site, you set a goal and you started a class. Kudos. Keep going. I will read, watch and hopefully encourage. I belong to three writing groups and one reading group. I can share some insights to your process.


    • Better thntherapy Mike,
      You’ve come late to my party – my “drive” is now in reverse. Since retiring this March 2015 I’m exploring “idle”!!! Insights and map directions are always appreciated and welcome.


  2. Wait – you were watching me?!!! Did I leave the window open? I want royalties if I’m going to be your subject and therefore subject to ridicule. Or you could share the ice cream – I like that flavor too. No, no, I need to eat healthy – save me the carrots and celery. What’s going on here – my mind is at war with my body and my conscience and with YOU! Enough – I’ll just eat my heart out over all my poor choices – that ought to lose about 1 pound. I feel better already.


    • Shari,
      Oooooooooooo Nooooooooooooo NOT your heart . . . your spleen, your appendix, tonsils . . . eat the expendable parts. Once the heart is gone all you will be able to crave is jello and you will lead a pathetic life, devoid of joy, purity and delight.

      P.S. I was watching you since the “characters” in my story are truly CHARACTERS.


  3. I laughed through most of that. You didn’t really think you could beat the devil on your shoulder did you?

    Where are you taking your class? I took several at Saddleback and loved everyone of them.


    • Jacqui,
      It’s the Saddleback Junior College Emeritus program. I was too “chicken” to take a regular college class. Thought I’d dip a toe in with this free class that is 90% over the age of 60! The teacher is in his 30’s so it’s going to be interrrrrrrrrresting.

      P.S. The devil on my shoulder . . . he’s an amateur compared to my brain!.


  4. Judy-Judith, have you been eavesdropping in my kitchen? I too had a similar conversation a few weeks ago, although my own mind started way earlier than yours (while still in the grocery store, in front of the big ADVERTISED SALE sign at the Häagen-Dazs display in the frozen food aisle, yelling at me to buy some. Such a good deal. Really, how could I NOT buy a carton?)

    I once ate half a box of uneaten Turtles chocolates – just to get them out of the house. That’s how conniving my mind is… I’ve now graduated to actually throwing out partly eaten cartons of Häagen-Dazs, which of course makes those two bowls a very expensive treat after all!


    • Carolyn,
      You are right! The “conversation” did start in the grocery store. Except my brain is very “cheap” and makes me buy the store brands. She’s quite strange – a cheap glutton.

      Throwing out partly eaten cartons of Haagen-Dazs!!!!!!!!! I’m reporting you to the authorities – there are laws against the willful destruction of ice cream other than by mouth!!!!!!


Click on "LIKE" to let us know you visited. Comments HERE!

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.