

3. This assignment was to do a self-portrait pencil sketch and incorporate symbols that reflect something about ourselves. As I was sketching one fine day, feeling like “death warmed over” the images of swords flashed so that’s what I incorporated, not thinking about the symbolism until . . . .

. . . one of the participants asked me “why the swords?” and here’s what came to mind:
I was very fatigued and couldn’t bring myself to move to a table so sat on couch, my sketch book in my lap, holding a mirror in one hand, sketching myself with the other hand. The image of swords popped in my mind.
They are a part of my hair because I (we all) carry a sense of the precarious, the dangerous with us, each in a different way. As I drew myself I was struck by how my internal image I have of myself is not what I saw in the mirror and what I saw has become someone I don’t recognize. The knives evolved in my mind of living on the knife’s edge.
There were originally 4 knives and I eliminated one. Now I’m wondering if they are also symbolic of “time” – past & present on the left (touching/intertwined) and future on the right??
Looking at the picture now, more detached, it appears almost as if my throat has been slit (I drew the shadow/wrinkle on my neck). It’s a disturbing picture but very reflective of how I feel when I’m in a flare of symptoms.
I call this “Self Portrait with Pears”. I tore up another charcoal picture that I didn’t like and pasted it on an acrylic painting of a bowl of pears that was a practice assignment from 2 years ago. The bowl of pear picture is upside down . . . if you’re wondering where the pears went . . .
Judy
Hmm… Which do I like better.
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Jacqui,
I hope it’s not the one with the knives!
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Swords..migranes?…just a thought. You always amaze me, dear Judy.
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The swords are probably the friends that keep slicing into my memories and mind and the guilt I feel for not keeping in touch. I think about you DAILY as you (and Len) are in my prayers. Sending my love always, j.
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Hi, Judith. Your art has come so far since you first started sharing. Happy Holidays!
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James,
How nice to “see your voice”. And it’s interesting to hear that in your eyes I’ve progressed because it’s difficult to see my own work objectively. I try to share the “unvarnished” to remind myself and show others that “perfection in self perception” is not the objective.
Stay safe.
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I am always in awe of your artwork. No interpretations but you are honest and talented. Wish we could visit in person – maybe in a year. Love you, dear friend.
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Shari,
Thanks for the “awe”. The one thing I do try for is honesty in both life and art so it’s lovely to have an affirmation. I too, am looking forward to seeing, touching and visiting. It is finally on the horizon. Miss you, love you, always! j.
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