Walking around my neighborhood, early in the pandemic lockdown, I noticed people wanted to talk. Even though staying a distance away, they were more friendly, stopping to chat, than pre-Covid19. It seems there is an important reason for the casual chat. While close friends are also important, research is showing that more casual or “weak-tie” friends offer some different benefits.
Weak Tie friends are not close friends but people you see regularly – from a shopkeeper to a casual neighbor, members of a group you belong to. You may just wave, say “Hi” maybe chat a bit.
Weak Tie, Strong Tie Friends
Having a good sized group of casual friends can increase your happiness, improve knowledge and your feelings of belonging.
Mark Granovetter’s* research found that quantity matters.
“Granovetter found that most people got their jobs through a friend-but 84% got their job through a weak tie friend, someone they saw only from time to time, not a close friend. As Granovetter saw that close friends tend to have the same information, but weak ties connect with different circles and can pass that information, like those of job opportunities, on to us. They also provide us with stimulation, new stories about what is happening or news about events. When it comes to weak ties, the more the merrier.”
People with more weak ties may be happier.
When researchers asked people to keep a record of their interactions and their mood they felt better on days when interacting more with weak-tie friends.
A study in Scotland and Italy showed that being a member of a group, such as a team or community group, gave people a feeling of more security and a sense of meaning.
Covid 19 had caused many of us to loosen those weak ties. Gyms, restaurants or bars are closed or limited. Working at home limits changes connections. Some companies have noticed that even chance meetings with others you don’t work closely with can feed creativity and enhance the transfer of information.
I’ll be more focused on keeping touch with my weak tie friends, through social media, giving people a call, chatting with neighbors or remembering to wave when I walk. They may even have some tips on coping with the pandemic.
PA
Howdy
*Mark Granovetter, a sociology professor, author of The Strength of Weak Ties
Maybe the reason we enjoy our weak-tie friendships is because they demand little investment on our part but reward us with feel-good sensations that lighten our moods. Our deepest friendships trouble us as we take their worrisome situations into our own hearts. I often worry about the people I care about deeply but rarely give more than brief notice to casual relationships. It seems that we can only emotionally maintain a limited number of deep friendships but can shelter an unlimited number of lighter relationships. We can only be at an emotional peak a finite amount of hours or we’ll crash from exhaustion.
Do you think weak-tie friends are likely to become close friends at some point? Or are the relationships too superficial to grow deeper?
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Shari,
Interesting thoughts on the demands of relationships.
I think weak tie friends are a different kind of relationship, but one that has value. Some weak tie friends do become close friends I would think.
Peggy
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Shari,
I soooo agree with you-Judy’s art is amazing. There is depth and richness in many of her works, and also an an outstanding range of style and content.
Peggy
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This makes a lot of sense and also explains the prevalent depression that seems to be running rampant right alongside the pandemic.
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Carol,
I am sure there are lots of reasons for depression with this pandemic, but you are right-this may be one of them.
Peggy
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Thanks, Peggy. I guess I am speaking from experience,, missing out on weak-tie friends.
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