Contests & give-aways

by

Celebration, Confession and Happy Anniversary*

Noticed the new header?  The critters are creations from CATNIPblog and the magnificently, masterful, murky minds of Peggy & me.

Love group

Tweeter, Woofer, Meowie, Squeakie & Grunter the Worm

Prisoner of Love

Here’s whatsup:

After retiring I have more and more time but, as you’ve noticed, there have been fewer and fewer posts on CURIOUS.  I have a “tendency” to accomplish things when faced with deadlines and commitments.  My other “tendency” is procrastination when left to my own devises.

Peggy, my co-collaborator on CATNIPblog, has provided both – deadlines & commitment.  She sets up the posting schedule and my commitment to her provides the impetus.

Because Curious to the Max is my first love – been posting since 2009 – I’ve asked Peggy  to help me schedule more CURIOUS posts.  She agreed (without completely knowing what she was getting into) to help, although I have not relinquished editorial control.  CURIOUS to the Max will stay true to:  “Curious STUFF that makes me love, learn and laugh”

CATNIPblog will stay true to:

“Self-care tips, tools, techniques & neuroscience research for MIND, BODY & SOUL – shared with a wink and a smile”

img_2891-1

Meowie

*P.S. Peggy and I, grateful for all the support and positive responses we’ve received, are holding a one-year-anniversary drawing from the list of all CATNIP’s subscribers.  To get in on the drawing click here:

CATNIPblog.com

by

Frankly Freddie – Your Picks, My Treat

Dear Human-beings,

Thank you for responding to my survey. For every response I got a treat.

Here are the top rated areas you’re most interested in reading on CATNIPblog:

Tied for #4

  • Quizes to learn about myself
  • How to deal with difficult people
  • Managing time and commitment

Tied for #3

  • How to improve relationships
  • Nutrition for brain health
  • Finding purpose

No tie for #2

  • Stress reduction – be calmer & more relaxed

Tied for #1

  • Mood lifters – quick ways to feel happy
  • Animal Tails & Tales

Other:

  • How to “read” other people in order to improve relationships
  • Humor – everything is funny seen through the right lens
  • How to deal with old age losses – friends, health, purpose

Peggy & Judy’s pick:  How to live in retirement in the manner we’d like to become accustomed.

Freddie’s pick:  How to get lots of treats without more polls and subscriber drawings.

Maui’s pick:  How to achieve alpha-status over Freddie. 

IF you haven’t already you can still be entered in my drawing, Click HERE:

Frankly Freddie – Catnipblog Subscriber Drawing

Frankly,

Freddie Parker Westerfield, CCT, RET

Freddie Parker Westerfield

by

Frankly Freddie – CATNIP coming to a computer near you!

Thank you for all your responses to my survey.  I got treats for being supportive.

Peggy and my human are excited to launch their new blog CATNIP

I’m getting excited too cuz I’m being supportive and will get treats for my contest.

catnip-logo-2

I keep asking them Why on earth name the new blog CATNIP and not FREDDIE?

According to humans, catnip makes you mellow. (What they don’t know is it drives cats wild with desire.) Peggy & Judy want to help you find your mellow but if it drives you wild with desire for more CATNIP they’ll be pleased.

Peggy and my human each worked for over 210 dog years as Licensed Marriage & Family Therapists.   That’s a lot of years.  They decided to share what they’ve learned and the tools they’ve taught rather than have all their stuff blindly dumped into a shredder after they’re gone.  

So . . .  continuing to be supportive . . .  I’m sponsoring a contest to help them be successful bloggers, like me. 

Everyone who subscribes to

CATNIP

  by Saturday, March 18, 2017 will be entered into a drawing and I, Freddie the supportive one, will send the winners a WONDERFUL prize.

Click here to enter!!  http://CATNIPblog.com 

PLEASE SUBSCRIBE to CATNIP so Peggy and my human don’t think I’ve sabotaged them (as retired psychotherapists they are sometimes a bit paranoid).

It’s easy – just enter your e-mail address in the subscribe box at the top right hand corner of the CATNIPBLOG site.

Freddie Parker Westerfield, CDT RET

Freddie Parker Westerfield, CCT RET

Frankly,

Freddie Parker Westerfield, Certified Canine Therapist, RET

P.S. I made them promise to have fun doing CATNIP.  I know them . . . if it isn’t fun they won’t do it.  So if you pay attention you’ll see some of their original drawings, stories, poems sneak on cat feet into the CATNIPblog.

 P.P.S.S. Neither Peggy nor my human are very smart when it comes to technical stuff. Ronna Skinner, graphic designer extraordinaire (not to mention Peggy’s cousin-in-law) helped get the cats Peggy drew, safely perched onto the letters where they can play with “CATNIP”  to their hearts content (and not bother me)

Ronna

Ronna

by

Frankly Freddie – I need your help

I’m trying to be very supportive, however, I think my human is sniffing catnip.

I was really glad she and her friend Peggy Arndt got together because Peggy gives me treats.  I was glad when they told me they were collaborating on a new blog where they were going to share the materials and techniques they used to help clients when they were psychotherapists because as a retired Certified Canine Therapist I want everyone to know how to make themselves feel good.

Now I’m upset.  They are calling the blog CATNIP because they think catnip makes you feel mellow.  If that isn’t bad enough they are dedicating CATNIP to Peggy’s cat Maui.

Personally, I think catnip makes you crazy and the blog should be dedicated to me.

Maui

Maui (not Freddie)

Now that they are both retired they seem to not be doing much of anything except wandering around*.   So they don’t go too far astray, I created a survey for them to help them be successful bloggers, like me.

Please fill out my survey for their CATNIP blog!  

(You can choose as many areas of interests as you want and when you’re done click “vote”)

Frankly,

Freddie Parker Westerfield, CCT, RET

Freddie Parker Westerfield, Published Author

 *Thank you for your kind response to this most delicate matter.

by

Do you know where your Epiglottis is tonight?

Mr. Epi Glottis

(If you missed the original Epiglotitis and FISH Face-off post between Laurie and me, you’d better read it so you can fully appreciate this post.  Here it is!)

https://judithwesterfield.wordpress.com/2011/10/09/face-off-which-gets-the-most-hits-epiglottitis-or-butterfly-fish/

This is the post, written by Laurie Fessler, that started it all!

Calling Epiglottitis A Bitch Is A Vast Understatement

“I have had epiglottitis twice; it is an ulcerated part of your epiglottis, below your throat, hidden in thieves. It is the worst pain I have ever had and I’ve had it two years in a row. Nobody knows what causes it, they think it’s a viral infection. As much as I have BEGGED for answers on how to prevent from getting it again, there are no answers. The doctors shake their heads kindly but have no information.”

Concession Speech

By Laurie Fessler

 http://hibernationnow.wordpress.com

“Shameless promotion for the blogfish, blobfish contest!!!! Ha Ha,

I think you win!!

Besides, who wants a really horrific sore throat that makes them want to die?”

Love, Laurie F.

Here’s what YOUR epiglottis looks like and where it’s located.

No wonder it hurts when you get epiglottitis!

P.S.  And here’s the post that started it all on my blog.  (I have to confess that I have lots of “FISH” posts to drive up my blog searches.  Laurie only has a couple of Epiglottis posts.  Please don’t tell her I’ve loaded the deck ….)

https://judithwesterfield.wordpress.com/2010/08/30/parenthetically-speaking-butterfly-fish-and-the-singles-scene/

by

Kiss UP to the Contest WINNERS!

I am UP and announcing the winners of the  Up Up & away Contest and doing the daily Haiku.  Thought it UP myself. Clever!

http://judithwesterfield.wordpress.com/2011/09/02/win-this-contest-up-up-and-away/

 Winners ALL are YOU

Kissing UP, the sweetest treat

You’re lip smacking good!

Welcome to Day 6 of The Height of Haiku Challenge, where your challenge is to write 30 haiku in 30 days, with the themes given here. The prompt today and #64 overall is KISS suggested by Nimue.                www.haiku-heights.com

TA DA!

Up Side Down Category Winner

Ida:  Stand up. Stand down

UP-Chuck Category Winners

Joyce Klenner:  Cough it up!

Maureen Killham-Kaech:  

http://moisbloggingithink.wordpress.com/

I really thought I was going to throw UP because I was so nauseous, but then you cracked me UP with this post, and so I didn’t.

Rub Up to Rose Category Winner

Laurie Fessler:  I think Rose is an UP and coming genius!

hibernationnow.wordpress.com

Looking Good Looking Up Category Winner

Terri Hodges:  I looked up to see a label this end up!

Ending Up, Up Beat Category Winner

Phylor   I think rose and judith are UP and coming creative folks.

phylor.wordpress.com

and if you are up for “SEEKING EQUILIBRIUM”

take a look at Rose’s  blog http://www.rosemaryl.blogspot.com/

Rose set me UP for the original post.  Rose,  I gave you a leg up!  So you’re a winner too!

Winners: Type UP your name, mailing address and Hypnotic Healing Recording you choose from the selection on the HYPNOTIC HEALING CD page on this blog: https://judithwesterfield.wordpress.com/hypnotic-healing-cds/  and

send to me in an e-mail:  judithwesterfield@gmail.com

by

YOU can Win this Contest: Up Up and Away!

Falling DOWN side UP?

Win a free Hypnotic Healing Recording!

Win notoriety for your grammatical excellence, for your knowledge of the English language, for your keen mind,

for your perseverance, for being up to date and up to the challenge of

submitting  all the different ways UP is used that are not up-loaded in this post.

Now . . . UP is a two-letter word that perhaps has more meanings than any other two-letter word

  • It’s easy to understand UP, meaning toward the sky or at the top of the list, but
  • when we awaken in the morning, why do we wake UP ?
  • At a meeting, why does a topic come UP?
  • Why do we speak UP and
  • why are the officers UP for election and
  • why is it UP to the secretary to write UP a report?
  • We call UP our friends.
  • People stir UP trouble, line UP for tickets, work UP an appetite, and think UP excuses.
  • To be dressed is one thing, but to be dressed UP is special.
  • A drain must be opened UP because it is stopped UP.
  • And we use it to brighten UP a room, polish UP the silver;
  • we warm UP the leftovers and clean UP the kitchen.
  • We lock UP the house and some guys fix UP the old car..
  • We open UP a store in the morning but we close it UP at night.
  • We seem to be pretty mixed UP about UP!

Rules:

  1. Use the word “up” in a sentence or a phrase that has not been used in this post.
  2. DO NOT look the word UP in a dictionary because in a desk-sized dictionary, up takes UP almost 1/4th of the page and can add UP to about thirty definitions.
  3. Send your entry in ONE (1) comment (in the comment box) to this post:  https://judithwesterfield.wordpress.com/2011/09/02/win-this-contest-up-up-and-away/   (I will not count up the number of UP’s sent to me by e-mail or multiple comments)
  4. Deadline for submissions:  Monday, September 5th 5 pm

So if you are UP to it,  try building UP a list of the many ways UP is used and send it.

Falling UP side DOWN?

It will take UP a lot of your time, but if you don’t give UP, you may wind UP with a hundred or more and be the winner of a free Hypnotic Healing Recording!

Don’t let UP get you down.

Thanks to

http://www.rosemaryl.blogspot.com/

“SEEKING EQUILIBRIUM”

for this post!

Rose, for sending this to me I’m giving you a leg up!

5 extra credit points!

P.S.  Check up Rose’s blog to see what kind of person would up and send me this!

by

I won a PhylorGanizing Kit

I made the 1,110 comment on Phylor’s blog!

http://phylor.wordpress.com/

Now not only didn’t I know Phylor had a contest but I almost didn’t find out I won.

Pylorganizing Kit

Look what I WON!

The candy erasers are on a plate to fool people who think they are real.

http://phylor.wordpress.com/

by

Learn The Winners and Read The Winning Haiku’s of the “What’s New? Haiku! Contest”

Haiku:  Three line poem

Line 1 – 5 syllables

Line 2 – 7 syllables

Line 3 – 5 syllables

https://judithwesterfield.wordpress.com/2011/01/23/contest-whats-new-haiku/

Read all the winners

My responses and Max too

It could have been YOU!

  1. Max enjoys his treats
    Walks are for contemplating
    Play time sure is fun

    • My Dear Best Friend Lorraine,
      You know all my tricks
      Come and take me for fun walks
      I’ll give you real licks

      LLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLL, Max

  2. Funny bended spoon
    Your childrens’ eyes bloom love, joy
    Hug them like flowers

  3. The snow is evil
    I am now claustrophobic
    At least until Spring

    • Laurie F.,
      Hurting Snow’s feelings
      is not a nice thing to do
      makes it melt sloooooooooly

  4. I got to try because I want a prize!

    My eyes scream loud
    “I want some eye cream right now!”
    Is that important?

    Max what’s the secret
    of a cool and fun human?
    Don’t tell me it’s you?

    I am so surprised
    I want that green stuff dog
    And the CD too!

    Thanks Judy and Max
    This may not sound like haiku
    I still don’t know.
    :)

    • creativitytothemaxJanuary 24, 2011

      Rhea,
      Four haikus at once!
      That alone is worth a prize
      Max is NO secret!

  5. MaureenJanuary 24, 2011

    I sit in my bed
    Watch the sun come up go down
    I love to watch snow

    REPLY

    • creativitytothemaxJanuary 24, 2011

      Maureen,
      In California
      watch the sun come up go down
      What on earth is snow

  6. hibernationnowJanuary 23, 2011

    I look at my hand
    Wrinkled, dry, old, slow, weeping
    My heart still beats, joy

    • creativitytothemaxJanuary 23, 2011

      Laurie,
      Beautiful Haiku
      Heart beating succulent Joy
      Written by your hand

  7. hibernationnowJanuary 23, 2011

    Phy is my friend too
    Let’s celebrate each other
    As creative souls

    phy is my nickname for LORRAINE.

    • creativitytothemaxJanuary 23, 2011

      Laurie,
      Celebrate, all souls!
      I agree with all you said
      Creativity it rocks!

  8. ErinJanuary 23, 2011

    broken fingernails
    not screeching down a chalkboard
    I am so happy

    REply

    • creativitytothemaxJanuary 23, 2011

      Erin,
      I can’t top this one
      The sound makes my stomach churn
      Get a manicure

  9. First haiku since grade school

    unbirthday to you
    means celebrate to me
    gifts, wishes, candles

    • creativitytothemaxJanuary 23, 2011

      Celebrate birthdays
      Celebrate unbirthdays too
      Celebrate Lorrraine!

      • phylorJanuary 27, 2011

        gentle snow falls down
        winter wraps garden in white
        trees shiver and wait

        Love your haikuish comments! And, another happy unbirthday to you, unbirthday girl.

Lorraine,
California snow
beige beach and blue green sea
there’s no white in sight

* * * * *

And the Winners are!

The Most Haiku’s Submitted:

Rhea

The Coldest & Warmest Haiku’s:

Laurie

The Most Appreciative Snow Haiku:

Maureen

The Biggest Variety of Topics:

Lorraine

The Biggest Sensory Overloaded Haiku:

Erin

Congratulations Rhea, Laurie, Maureen, Lorraine, Erin!!!!

  1. Please go to the Hypnotic Healing CD Page on this Blog
  2. Pick out your  CD or one of the 2 remaining Puppies (Rhea you get your pick of the litter)
  3. E-mail me which you choose and your mailing address)

SEE! I TOLD ALL OF YOU TO ENTER!

by

Contest! What’s New? Haiku!


Haiku:  Three line poem

Line 1 – 5 syllables

Line 2 – 7 syllables

Line 3 – 5 syllables

Examples:

My Haiku about Haikus
Haiku is easy
go ahead and jump right in
There’s no need to rhyme

My haiku about feet
All ten of my  toes
are connected to my feet
they wiggle, it’s neat

My haiku about Love
How about a kiss
using both your luscious lips
yes, smack it to me!

PRIZES!!!

A Hypnotic Healing CD, worth $20,  or

One of Max’s Green stuffed Dogs

YOUR choice.

A winner in each category!

Here are the 3 categories:
  1. A body part, that is legal when visible in public.
  2. Max
  3. “Surprise me”,  your choice of topic

Rules

  • You must be a subscriber to this blog.  It’s easy, just click on e-mail subscriptions (top of sidebar) or RSS (in the Header)
  • You may enter as many Haikus as you like in each category.
  • A different winner in each category, even if you think your Haiku is the best in more than one category.
That means three of you at a minimum will win!
How do you beat those odds considering only 3 people at the most ever leave comments.
  • Winning entries will be decided on a whim by Judy and will not necessarily reflect the opinions of WordPress nor the vagaries of literary criticism.
  • Write your Haiku(s) in the comments section of this post.
  • Closing deadline:  February 12th, the last day of my Unbirthday.
Your fingers to count
syllables five, seven, five
Not cheating to use

You’ve nothing to lose
Sending your haikus to me
So  easy, you’ll see
 

 


by

What’s in a Name, anyway?: Tallulah Kulula Pacehead

In case you want to name your baby, dog, cat, parakeet or orangutan after my pacemaker:

Kulula

Got Milk?

  • The name of Kulula gives you a responsible, reserved, and dignified nature, able to find a certain amount of success in anything you undertake.
  • You have an appreciation for the finer and deeper aspects of life.
  • Your scholarly, studious interests incline you to art, literature, philosophy, music, and drama.

    Got Fruit?

  • You wonder about the deeper aspects of life contained in religious theories and occult beliefs.
  • Although the name Kulula creates an interest in the deeper aspects of life, we emphasize that it causes a superior, interfering expression whose favorite expression is “I know.”

  • isiXhosa meaning of “take off”.

    Got dessert?

  • Zulu word, meaning “it is light” or “it is simple, “easy”

  • Swahili, “Superior”

Zulu, word meaning “easy”

Tallulah

The girl’s name Tallulah \t(a)-llu-lah\ is of Native American Indian origin, and the meaning of Tallulah is “leaping water“. Related to the Choctaw word for water, “oka”. The Choctaws lived near the Tallulah waterfall, which derives its name from the Hitchiti (Creek) Indian word for “town“.

The name also possibly derives from a Gaelic name meaning “fruitful woman”. bundance, lady, princess.

Got a florist?

Actress Tallulah Bankhead (20th century), was raised in the American South not far from Georgia’s Tallulah Falls. The name had been in her family for a while, and she was named after her paternal grandmother.

Got legs?

A
by

Pacemaker contest: Blog-a-phobic Entries

Ever CRAVE to be a strawberry blond?

Our age is showing!  Friends, relatives, colleagues have suggested names for my pacemaker but don’t know how to access a blog, can’t figure out how to subscribe or don’t want to even try – preferring the telephone.  (I suppose that’s like sending messages Pony Express when it could be trucked in)

Here’s the blob-a-phobic entries – names are kept confidential so no one is exposed as being an “old fogey” . . .

Jeanie – “I dream of Jeanie” the TV show

Tina – “Tina Turner” who never seems to wind down.

Bunny – Yup, you guessed it from “The Energizer Bunny”

The Hootchie Kootchie Girl

Lola -The song: ” Whatever Lola Wants, Lola Gets and little girl, Lola wants you . . .”

Patti Pacemaker LaBelle

and last but not least . . .

Lady GoGo

by

Contest: The many faces (cosmetic) of my Pacemaker


Enter your name for her!  It’s not too late.  She’s still got attitude and is “sore” . . . about something.

Prizes! Prizes! Prizes!

P.S. She has some VERY FAMOUS lips.  Can you tell which 2 celebrities they are?

by

Contest: Pacemaker Names and Portrait

Laurie M. Judy my first entry is the name J.P. (judy’s pacemaker) I’ll think of more. We can enter more than once, right?  RIGHT!

Linda W.
How about “Rose”. Because your wonderful little P.M. puts the rosey color in your cheeks and ensures you will continue to see the world through Rose Colored Glasses & a Rose Colored Heart……You can even have a beautiful rose tattoo.

Cindy D
I think you should name her “Tweeker”. She tweeks when you need her to and as all pacemakers they need to be tweeked so they do their job right….(Just like everybody else) we all need a little “tweeking” from time to time to help us keep on “pace”.

Daru
Our family had a friend named Ticky…but we could give her a title Miss Wired…

Here are some facts to jump-start YOUR creativity:

♥ Her parents are Mr & Mrs Biotronik

♥ Her adoption cost $38,000, not including doctors fees for 8 hours in the hospital (no meals)

♥ She’s a girl . . .

Submit your name!


by

Real Contest: Name my Pacemaker

People keep asking what my Pacemakers name is.  She doesn’t get a name until she meets these criteria:

Criteria

A relative of my pacemaker

1.  She changes her attitude and is no longer “sore”.

2. She needs no further “tweaking”. Everytime she is ‘tweaked” it costs the taxpayers $2500!  Thank goodness for Medicare.

As my cardiologist explained: All pacemakers are generic when they come out of the box.  They have to be electronically adjusted to make it “Judy’s Pacemaker”.  She’s been tweaked twice now.

I have faith that she will meet my criteria – hopefully sooner than later.

To motivate her I am having a contest to find her a name.

(This is a real contest with real prizes despite the rules)

Contest Rules:

  1. The contest starts now and ends when she meets the above criteria.
  2. The winner  and runners-up have a choice of prizes which shall be posted at a later date.
  3. All the rest of you will be entered into a drawing which rules Max is thinking about.
  4. There will be more rules as I make them up.
  5. All rules can be changed  or added to by me at anytime.
  6. You can be related to my pacemaker, me or Max to enter.
  7. You can enter as many times as you like.  However each time it must be a separate entry.  That way my blog stats go up.
  8. All blog subscribers will be able to vote for the name.  Rules about voting will be posted as soon as I make them up.
  9. You will be disqualified if you are not a registered voter in the state or country in which you reside.
  10. You will be disqualified if you use nasty language or make mean comments.  Nasty language and mean comments to be determined by Max & me.

I will periodically post information from her bio and pictures on the Name That Pacemarker! Contest page.   (Some are there RIGHT NOW)

Put your entry name in the Reply box on the NAME THAT PACEMAKER! CONTEST PAGE.

NOT on this page – nor any other page – nor a separate e-mail,  nor a phone message!

Entries received in snail-mail with money in them will be considered depending on how much money.  All money collected is the property of Judith Westerfield
by

In a Heart Beat

My Heart

Ended up at the cardiologist twice this week for heart-tweaking.  As my doctor explained:  Pacemakers are all generic and identical when they come out of the box.  We won’t know for a while when my generic pacemaker has become Judy’s Pacemaker.  Until then she does NOT get a name!

The first trip they lowered the “electrical output”. This morning they turned off a gizmo that automatically set the frequency of the heart beat when it “senses” activity.  All I had to do is water 3 potted plants on the patio with a watering can or walk quickly to the car and my heart rate would zoom up past 100.

I have a “slight” tendency to ignore, deny, repress and minimize things about my own health.   I have an inkling that I’ve been more stressed over all this pacemaker stuff than I’ve been consciously aware of .

However, since God created denial and repression I will continue to embrace them in a heart beat.

by

Pacemaker Activity Guidelines

Before they discharged me last night the nurse read the guidelines, which I had to agree to or they would not let me leave with my pacemaker:

• You should limit use of your arm and shoulder where the pacemaker was placed for the first 1 to 3 months. You should NOT do any heavy pushing, (Read: Be more lenient with my clients) pulling, (no tearing out hair when being more lenient) or raising your arm above your shoulder (do not hit clients you are TRYING to be lenient with) until told otherwise by your cardiologist.

• Do not drive until advised by your cardiologist. This is usually 1 to 4 weeks. (Choice – Take the bus and buy new walking shoes to get to a bus-stop)

• You may do light housework such as (watching your husband . . .) wash dishes and cook. Avoid vacuuming, lifting laundry, overhead cleaning, and activities that require frequent reaching. (Good to know I can continue avoiding all of the above, as usual)

• Ask your cardiologist before doing any sport activities such as golf, bowling, wrestling, hunting, fishing (there goes all my passions) or weight lifting. (there goes my dream of the Ms. World title)

Pacemaker Precautions

• Avoid being near areas with high voltage, magnetic force fields, or radiation because these can cause pacemaker malfunction. (!!! Whaaaaaa?) These areas may include high tension wires, power plants, large industrial magnets and arc welding machines. (There goes my career) Symptoms of pacemaker malfunction are dizziness, lightheadedness or changes in heart rhythm. (Hey!  this is what I got a pacemaker for!) If symptoms occur, back up 10 feet (I thought I wasn’t allowed to drive?) and check your pulse. (Read:  If you have no pulse you don’t need to backup 10 feet)

• Pacemakers inserted today are not affected by microwave ovens. (Yes!  My cooking appliance of choice) Pacemakers have built-in safety mechanisms protecting them from this electrical interference. (Why don’t they have built-in safety mechanisms protecting me from power plants, large industrial magnets and arc welding machines?)

• When you go to an airport, always carry your pacemaker card with you. Because the pacemaker contains metal, it may trigger an airport metal detector. Explain to the airport attendant (Have YOU ever tried to “explain” to an airport attendant anything?) that you have a pacemaker so that special arrangements (read: strip search) can be made for a security check. The metal detector itself will NOT harm the pacemaker. (Read: But the attendant could . . )

• Do not have an MRI (Magnetic Resonance Imaging) test because it can damage your pacemaker. (From now on all diagnostics will be done through exploratory surgery)

Call your cardiologist if you have:

• severe pain at your pacemaker site  (With Fibromyalgia I always have pain at the pacemaker site- long before I had a pacemaker)

• frequent or constant hiccups (Read:  Lay off the beer & peanuts)

• twitching of your abdominal muscles (No sex?)

• shortness of breath  (Yup, no sex)

• dizziness, light-headedness or blackouts (Positively no sex – oh well, what’s sex without beer & peanuts . . .)