O’ Woe is Me and my Rule of Halves (parenthetically speaking)

My dear Curious to the Max followers,

I imagine there are millions of you (I have a big imagination) who wait with bated breath and quickening heart beats for my posts – I shall call you Group Numero UNO.  You are keenly aware (due to your breath and heart rhythm) I’ve been bloggingly absent.  The rest of you (group 2, small “g”) are scratching your heads (or other parts) and wondering what I’m talking about because your lives, breath and hearts have gone on nicely without my posting.

For Numero UNO:  I just have lost my mojo, my energy, my focus – not interested in writing, reading, gardening, e-mailing, blog posts started and abandoned . . .  I’m giving credit to a fibromyalgia flare-up because fibromyalgia should be good for something.

For the second group: I am LOST, DEPLETED, SUFFERING and you probably don’t care . . .

On a serious note (not that I wasn’t serious before) fibromyalgia along with many other chronic conditions has a mind of it’s own and takes over at unexpected and unpropitious times.  After over 20 years of living with this condition I’ve still not got the hang of it.  When I feel decent I go, do, get overly involved and then crash for days, sometimes weeks (or months, but who’s counting).

The BACK half

The BACK half

To better manage what energy I have I’ve decided to do half of the ten things I currently need or want to do:

  1. Complete half the alphabet for the on-line daily blogging alphabet posting challenge. (I’ve half a mind not to even do the challenge this year and repost what I wrote LAST year).
  2. Brush half my teeth each day (I’ll alternate halves – half in the morning and half before bed)
  3. Clean and dust the half of the house I can’t reach.
  4. Stop watching the Super Bowl at half-time.
  5. Eat half the pan of brownies I’m making (half today and half tomorrow).

That’s half of my plans so I’m not going to write the other five.  

My New Motto (you can borrow it):

Live half my life with gusto, let the other half rest.

"This woman is half-baked as ever . . . "

“This woman is half-baked”

 

 

 

Idle or Lazy? I Prefer Physics

“Inertia is the resistance of any physical object (read “Judy”) to a change in its state of motion or rest (the later, not the former), or the tendency of an object (“read Judy”) to resist any change in its motion.”

“The principle of inertia is one of the fundamental principles of classical physics which are used to describe the motion of matter and how it is affected by applied forces. Inertia comes from the Latin word, iners, meaning idle, or lazy” (I prefer the meaning of “resting”). Wikipedia

I was talking to a wonderful client today, smart, perceptive, talented, dedicated to personal growth (how can that NOT be wonderful), about having inspirations and aspirations but doing nothing about them other than thinking.  Was it fear of failure?, avoidance of success?, lack of focus, ability?   All of the above?  I flashed on my blogging (hey, sometimes it IS about ME . . .)

I had blogged almost daily for a few years.  Then recently my heart went wack-o (literally) and I just didn’t have the where-with-all to think much less write.  

It’s been a struggle to get back into the habit of talking to all of you. (well, no, to be truthful I’ve not struggled as that implies movement).  It’s been out-of-sight-out-of-mind-floating-around-in-the-ether-what-have-I-got-to-say-anyway kind of thing.

How many times in my life – in YOUR life – has inertia of motion kept me doing a task that was needed or important to me.  And how many times in my life – yours too – has inertia of rest kept me from doing something potentially gratifying?   I admit it’s happened in more areas then I’d like to admit.

Not everything is psychology.  Much of the time it’s just physics.  Nice to be able to blame something other than my psyche.

Why on earth should I keep Blogging? A letter to Lydias

Lydia's REAL Furry Ferret! "KODA BEAR"

I received this comment on the blog:

“Thanks. It gave me a smile to see my poem here. And the quote from mindfulness. I’m happy I stumbled on this blog. I was in a serious car accident a couple of months ago. I got a serious concussion and am still in the process of healing. This site encouraged me to explore more creativity. I can’t read music to practice my instrument but I can play with haiku. lol. It seems the rhythm of haiku is something my mind locks into a bit. (= Every day a new one; every day healing.”     Lydia,   ferretrunner.wordpress.com

About the Accident

Wreck, by Lydia

Ice stealing control
Gravity pulls, spiral down
Sudden crash, blackness.

Summer
Deep indigo sky
Crickets sing fireflies flash
Bright stars dance in night

Anxiety
Anxiety is
Shapeless dark monster pouncing
Snacking on life unlived

Ferrets
Paw thumping on floor
Ferret teeth chewing at itch
Wake up! It’s playtime!

Dear Lydia,

Sometimes I get discouraged.  It can be a very lonely, solitary experience connecting with thousands of people in cyberspace.  Well, not thousands, 80 or 90 at best and many of them are looking for information on butterfly fish – butterfly fish is the single most searched item on my blog, bar none.

I digress.  

I do get discouraged.  I often wonder if I would reach more people if I were more consistent in my blog topics.  I have a “swap meet-style” (you never know what you’re going to find – treasure or trash) rather than a “shoe store-style” (you always know what you’ll find, you just don’t know if it will fit).

I dismiss that thought because I have to amuse and interest myself to continue blogging in the event that no one else is amused or interested.  

What really makes me continue blogging are all “the Lydias”.  Every once in a while I get a message from someone like you who tells me that something I’ve written, or reposted has helped them in some small way.  

That brings a smile to my face, love to my soul and sends my fingers walking up and down the swap-meet aisles.

Thank you Lydia for taking your time to comment.

Judy

P.S.  If you want to meet Lydia’s Ferrets — about the cutest things I’ve seen go to:

http://ferretrunner.wordpress.com/2011/07/04/introducing-my-furchildren/