My Annual Birthday Season!

After 71 times it’s getting a bit boring . . . another birthday . . .  Now don’t get me wrong I’m grateful I’m still around to celebrate but as Groucho Marx said: 

“Age is not a particularly interesting subject.  Anyone can get old.  All you have to do is live long enough.” 

The good news is my birthday SEASON** is getting longer . . . and so is YOURS.  In case, you’ve forgotten the rules (because you are getting old and forget a lot of things) and want to celebrate your own Birthday Season I’m reposting my repost from my reposted repost that I repost every year.
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Birthday Season Rules:

  1. Beginning on the day of your birth your season lasts the number of days you are old.  Consequently, every year your Birthday Season is one day longer.  With me so far?
  2. You are to celebrate your birth the entire season by choosing whatever you wish to do, or NOT do,  each day.  So far so good!
  3. People give you presents the entire season.  SO GOOD, so far!
  4. You must be over 50 to qualify for Birthday Season status.  (Over 50 you need more time to celebrate because it takes you longer.)
  5. You may start your Birthday Season before the actual date of your birth.  But you cannot exceed the number of days you are old.
  6. Those who are under the age of 50 can celebrate a Birthday Season as long as they don’t tell anyone or demand presents.(Gargle thoroughly after breakfast to eliminate tell-tale “Birthday Season Breath”.)
  7. You must eat doughnuts everyday for breakfast during your season. (If you don’t like doughnuts you can choose anything you want as long as it isn’t healthy).
  8. Every day of your season you must be grateful for being born and still being alive.  (After your Birthday Season is over you can revert to moaning about your age).

**In case, you’ve forgotten how the

Birthday Seasons Rules came to be

  (because you are getting old and forget a lot of things)

here’s how :

Many years ago my good friend Bernice and I were sitting in a motel room (don’t go THERE – we were at the motel, attending an imagery conference) eating doughnuts for breakfast.  We picked this motel because it had FREE doughnuts and coffee every morning.   It was just before our birthdays which are a few weeks apart.

A bit giddy from not sleeping well on motel mattresses and slightly inebriated on chocolate covered doughnuts, we decided that if we were going to get older each year we would at least take advantage of our accumulating age.  We created OUR BIRTHDAY SEASON.

"Food for thought . . . "

“Doughnuts . . . . . . .Food for thought . . . “

Click here for my birthday “make-overs” I was contemplating last year: 17 years and 2 months left to live

21 Ways to Keep Your Sanity for the Holidays

Oh my gosh!  I missed reposting my annual holiday post.  For those of you who already celebrated Chanukah you’ll have images-7to remember the tips for next year when I might forget to post them again.  For those of you who celebrate Christmas you have 4 days to follow the tips.  For the rest of you, you can ALWAYS follow the last two tips any time you run out of steam or time …
So! As I speak, time is running out. (Actually “time” doesn’t run out it since linear “time” is just a tiny mechanism in our brains that helps us keep our sanity).

Peace on Earth & Sanity to all my Friends!

Christmas:

  1. Instead of buying a tree watch your friends decorate (and take down) theirs
  2. Convert to Judaism
  3. Sit in the lobby of a 5-star hotel and enjoy EXPENSIVE decorations.
  4. Adopt a turkey, instead of eating one.
  5. Make dinner potluck, you supply the paper plates and plastic cutlery
  6. Christmas dinner – Start with dessert and forget the rest.
  7. Sit on the beach in Bali
  8. Go to bed on the 23rd and get up on the 3rd
  9. Only buy presents for Jesus.
  10. Put a cover on the outside chimney opening so you don’t have to put out cookies and milk.

Chanukah:

images-3-111. Watch your friends decorate (and take down) their Christmas tree.

12. Convert to Christianity

13. Stay in a 5-star hotel for 8 days and nights.

14. Use credit cards instead of gelt

15. Instead of gambling with a dreidle at home go to Vegasimages-1-1

16. Don’t give presents, do good deeds

17. Go to bed on Thanksgiving and wake up on Christmas

18. Bake a potato instead of grating them to death

19. Eat macaroons with Ben & Jerry

New Years:

20. Remember, you are in bed until the 3rd, unless you’re Jewish.

21. If you are Jewish, go back to bed.

What Stuff do you Need? What Stuff do you Want?

Needs and wants are perhaps even more significant a topic at this time of year.  Every year I am faced with getting my husband both birthday and Christmas presents.  This strains my brain to figure out what he “wants” or “needs”.

Gifts of need or want?

never knowing what to buy

A strain on my brain

Then yesterday I received this comment from a “linkedin” friend:

“You seem like a lady who has everything?  

I wonder…what do you want for
Christmas?”

At first, I wondered what I had said in a post or comment to give the impression that I had everything?

Humph, All I want is water

Then I wondered if I really take the time to think about the distinction between what I need and what I want.

Then I thought about Ida who has to weigh this question daily since she  is, out of necessity,  forced to survive on the bare minimum.

Susan Gammage wrote an excellent post on the topic.  It’s too long to repost but here’s how it starts:

“Recently I was listening to a podcast on our relationship to money by my favorite minister, Jeremy McClung of the Muskoka Community Church, which left me asking the question:  When is enough, enough?  This is an important question to ask especially at this season of excess we call Christmas.”
“In his talk, Jeremy handed out index cards and asked us to write “stuff I have” on one side and to write “stuff I want” on the other.  We were to make a detailed list of everything we own (land, cars, houses, clothes, electronics, appliances, toys etc)”.
“What surprised me was how much was on my “want” side!  Even though I have everything I need, and more, the list of what I wanted was longer than the list of what I owned.  This was profound!  I urge you to take out a sheet of paper right now and do this exercise for yourself.”
“My income comes from a small disability pension, supplemented by some paid work, and I live in a small one bedroom apartment in a “geared to income” building.  Some people look at my lifestyle and long for me to be better off financially, and sometimes I wonder if they’re right.  
My well-wishers see the transformative path I’ve been on for the past couple of decades, and how far I’ve come in ridding myself of the anxiety and depression that robbed me of my life, and they think it’s time for me to get back into the “real world” and get paid for all the work I do.

Susan citing the following REALLY got my attention:

If you could fit the entire population of the world into a village consisting of 100 people, maintaining the proportions of all the people living on Earth, that village would consist of:

  • 57 Asians
    21 Europeans
    14 Americans (North, Central and South)
    8 Africans
  • There would be:
    52 women and 48 men
    30 Caucasians and 70 non-Caucasians
    30 Christians and 70 non-Christians
  • Humph, Zero fish?

  • In addition:
    6 people would possess 59% of the wealth and they would all come from the USA
    80 would live in poverty
    70 would be illiterate
    50 would suffer from hunger and malnutrition
    1 would be dying
    1 would be being born
    1 would own a computer
    1 (yes, only one) would have a university degree

    Humph, One Blobfish left high and dry

      If we looked at the world in this way, the need for acceptance and understanding would be obvious.     But, consider again the following…

  • If you have never experienced the horror of war, the solitude of prison, the pain of torture, were not close to death from starvation, then you are better off than 500 million people
  • If you can go to your place of worship without fear that someone will assault or kill you, then you are luckier than 3 billion (that’s right) people.
  • If you have food in the fridge, clothes on your back, a roof over your head and a place to sleep, you are wealthier than 75% of the world’s population.
  • If you currently have money in the bank, in your wallet and a few coins in your purse, you are one of 8 of the privileged few amongst the 100 people in the world.
  • If your parents are still alive and still married, you’re a rare individual.
  • If you’re reading this message, you’re extremely lucky, because you don’t comprise one of those 2 billion people who still can’t read.    (source unknown: http://www.movebeyond.net/417/know-no-limits/quote/lightening-in-a-jar/

Dear Linkedin Friend,  Thank you for asking.

My greedy little ego will probably never be satisfied.

My soul tells me I have everything I need. 

http://susangammage.com/when-is-enough-enough-a-bahai-perspective/comment-page-1#comment-1298

Humph, All I need is water.