Dear Human Beings,
I’ve already had the best Valentines Day. Auntie Susan brought me a Valentine present. (It was actually a belated Christmas gift because she forgot me at Christmas – I forgave her because she is sometimes forgetful and I love her.)
I needed this monkey because I gave Moosie, which Auntie Lyn gave me last year, a lobotomy.
I hope you get a monkey for Valentine’s day too.
Freddie Parker Westerfield, CDT
Canine Dog Therapist
Bold and daring
Desire does me in
Carbs and sugar titillate
Cravings drive the lust
Chocolate Chip Cookie Pie
1 unbaked 9-inch (4-cup volume) deep-dish pie shell*
2 large eggs
1/2 cup all-purpose flour
1/2 cup granulated sugar
1/2 cup packed brown sugar
3/4 cup (1 1/2 sticks) butter, softened
1 cup (6 ounces) semi-sweet chocolate morsels
1 cup chopped pecans
Serve with ice cream (optional) OPTIONAL! That must be a typo in the original recipe?
Pre-heat oven 325 degrees F.
Beat eggs in large mixer bowl on high until foamy.
Beat in flour, granulated sugar and brown sugar. Beat in butter.
Stir in morsels and nuts and spoon into pie shell.
Bake for 55-60 minutes. (This is probably the optional part)
Cool on wire rack. Serve warm.
Recipe from Nestle Classic Recipes, 2003
* If using frozen pie shell, use deep dish style and thaw completely.
Bake on baking sheet and increase baking time slightly.
Dear All My Best Friends,
I’m so disappointed. My Human should tell you to put doggie treats inside the valentine and make sure the paste is edible.
If you don’t know what I’m talking about it proves you didn’t read my article What to Send ME MAX for Valentines Day.
Lickingly yours, LLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLL
You’ll now see why I’m so disappointed in my Humans Tutorial – my comments are in blue
At the last First Friday we made Secret-Inside Valentines. In case you weren’t able to come, especially for those of you whose plane flight was cancelled because of weather or you weren’t able to dig your car out, (I dig for treats) here’s how!
Secret Inside Valentine
• Colored Paper or Printed Paper OR
• White paper, painted
• Heart shape
• Paper Towels OR Colored Tissue Paper
• Acrylic Craft Paint
• Staples or glue or needle and thread
- Small valentine candy pieces (optional) (Doggie Treats are NOT OPTIONAL)
Pre Prep Preparation – Paper Towel Ruffle
1. Squirt 1- 2 paint colors onto one paper towel – try out different colors
2. Layer one towel on each side of paint smeared paper towel.
3. Wet paper towels and smush into a ball
4. Take apart towels and hang to dry
(If you want the less messy, less fun, more expensive route use colored tissue paper instead)
• Write a secret message on a slip of paper, smaller than the valentine (Skip the secret message part and get right to the treats)
1. Cut out 2 identical heart shapes
2. Decorate one side of each heart shape. Paint, Doodle, Glitter – Glam it up!
3. Tear the dried paper towel or tissue paper into strips
4. Paste strips around the entire perimeter of the inside of one heart
5. Lay secret message and/or candy on the inside of this heart. (Here we go again . . .put doggie treats inside!)
6. Lay the second heart on top of this – inside – to inside. Create a “sandwich” with the secret message inside.
7. Join the front and back hearts using staples or glue or sew around the edge. (Do NOT use staples or sew!- edible glue ONLY please)
You secret message is sandwiched between the front and back hearts. (How many times do I have to remind you? Skip the secret message and stuff with doggie treats)
Give your Secret-Inside Valentine to your Secret Valentine !
Remember to send it to me c/o Sweetie Girl Judy.
I wrote this column for my Max-E-zine 5 years ago! Would you believe – nothing has changed. Things never change with my Humans. They just are more and more untrainable the older they get. Maybe it’s not too late for YOU to learn how to treat your best friend:
What’s in a Name, By Max
“My human asked me to write a special column for Valentines Day. Is that chutzbah or what! Valentine’s day is NOT for dogs.
First everyone, but ME, gets to eat chocolate. My Human says that if I eat chocolate I’ll die. I think she is lying so she can eat it all, which she does.
Second, everyone, but ME, gets flowers. So I go out into the yard and eat as many flowers as I can. They don’t taste as good as lawn grass. I love it freshly mowed. But don’t send me flowers or grass on Valentines’ day. Send dog cookies, they don’t wilt.
Third everyone, but ME, gets valentine cards. I like to eat cards but I prefer the envelopes which are seasoned with paste. You can send me cards with envelopes.
Ok, ok you are wondering why I titled this What’s in a Name. Well, it is STILL happening even tho my humans have been in training for over a decade.
My name is Max right! Of course you know that. EVERYONE knows that. This blog is called CreativitytotheMAX,the blog, my web-sites are called HypnosistotheMAX and CreativitytotheMAX. Well, my humans STILL are calling me Sweetie Dog, Honey (can you believe how emasculating that is), Maxie, Good Dog and Sweetie Boy. The only time I’m called Max is when my humans are upset over nothing – Maaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa ‘AAAAX
Even though I ‘m an excellent trainer they still insist on those embarrassing names. So I show them. When I’m called to come inside I take my tiiiiii ‘iiime. Drives them crazy.
May your valentines day be filled with licks of love and please call your Sweetie a name that isn’t humiliating.